Things I've Heard in Airports #1

I fly every week somewhere. Done it for a while. Here are some things I've heard people say.

1. Loudspeaker: "Will the person who left their wedding ring at gate B11 , please return to claim it?"

2. Man on cell phone: "Tell him he's fired" I don't care if he'll cry."

3. Woman to Man: (while waiting in line to board): "I want a divorce."
Man to Woman: "What?"
Woman to Man: "You heard me, now get it taken care of"
(they had to sit together on the flight, not speaking for a while, but believe it or not, before we landed (several glasses of wine later) they were kissing like newly weds.

4. Man to me: "Do you want to swap seats-- my window seat for your aisle seat"?
Me to man: "No, that's fine, I think I'll keep this seat".
Man to me: What's the matter, are you scared (afraid) to sit by the window?
Me to Man: No, but statistically, you do stand a greater chance of falling out of the plane sitting by the window"
Man to me: Silence

5. Jan 2009. As we arrived at the gate in Phoenix, Flight Attendant to some kids on the plane who flew without parents or adults: "OK, you UM's (Un-escorted Minors), stay in your seats, don't move until I tell you to move." Nice, SouthWest Airlines does a good job of training boot-camp instructors.